I found out the hard way... hours of phone calls and searching websites.
After much searching, I made the final call to HTC and got someone who truly knew the answer, so I will share since nobody else will. BTW I've updated 2 Aria's since this original posting.
When it tells you that it has disconnected (so it was explained) is that it's gone to the root rather than using Sync. It will not recognize the Sync or connection program because you've gone into the 'heart' of the ROM. THIS IS NORMAL so do not fear. This is hard to do as I white knucked through it it the first time because... who wants a brick. Just keep going with the install program from the PC thru the USB cable. Each of mine took about 4 to 5 minutes, maybe less and the reboot can take a couple of minutes.
lose the ability to assign a seperate picture on the lock screen. *sadly*
have to reset your preferences and re-pair any bluetooth items.
need to reset any Google/gmail acct to use android market to D/L prev used apps
Hope this helps. We need a STICKY on this subject. PLEEEEZE Somebody.