K-9 has access to my full contact list, but I am running MotoBlur.
It can be set to access the server as often as you like...1 minute, 5, 15...etc.
It does support attachments.
I'm not sure about only downloading the first 20k. I think it downloads all the text and the attachments.
It notifies of emails with whatever tone you want with also the option to vibrate.
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