I posted this a while back in April, but no one replied, so I don't know if it is a good app or not. The Market page says it is compatible with Android 2.1 and 2.2. It may not work with the 2.3.
It may not offer all of the functions you are looking for, either.
It's a free app so you can't lose by checking it out.
Originally Posted by iron_city
I guess you could try droid shuffle
. I've never used it, but it's supposed to control headsets with the controls on the cord.