We have reached an agreement. After calling again today and being disconnected I finally got through and spoke to a supervisor named Jason. We went back and forth and finally reached an agreement on upgrading me to the Samsung Galaxy Nexus for a significantly lower price. He understood my plight and was inclined to work his way of helping me. I will not say how he did it but he had to work a little supervisor magic to get it done. I will receive my phone tomorrow and will not have to worry about being throttled anymore, even though I do not have 4G in my area.
I just kept vigillant and stuck to my guns. When I explained that even though I would be upgrading to a 4G phone I would still be on the 3G network around my area and therefore would be on the same exact network I was being throttled on now but with a shiny new phone... he saw what I was trying to say when I said it was extortion that I had to pay more(new phone) to be on the same network I'm on now just without having to worry about throttling.
Motorola Razr Maxx LTE w/ Some Random Custom ROM, whichever is in my crackflasher habit's moment.