Good suggestions, all of them. What I've found - finally - is that I have to manually hit the sync button on my phone, on the gmail /google account. Magic. The phone syncs, the calendar is there, all is well with the world.
However, it used to be automatic and I can't figure out why it stopped that. Grateful that I can do it - I don't have that many appointments so I just sync when I add one. Usually I add in Outlook, then sync outlook to google calendar, then sync the phone. It sounds like a lot of steps but it's pretty effortless.
This is my first smartphone and I haven't really learned how to use many of its features... must do that. But the syncing problem was one that had worked and then stopped.
Okay the phone is currently smarter than I am....
Thanks for all the help - sounds like I'm not the only one!