Sadly, I don't think such a thing exists.
There are two areas where I think Android is really (really) weak compared to IOS and that is desktop syncing and backup. On an iPhone both are a simple click in iTunes. I had to do what you are trying to do on an iPhone once and it was an absolute doddle.
I have spent a lot of time looking for a solution to these issues but it just doesn't exist.
As far as backups are concerned, your best best is a nandroid backup performed using something like ClockworkMod and an app backup using Titanium Backup Pro. However, both of these require fairly extensive modifications to your phone. If you are not rooted with a custom recovery, I don't think what you want to do is possible.