I've got to ask the question since so many think communication is the answer here. What do you do when communication fails? Repeatedly, for years.
I have followed advice for years now from other parents, therapists, cops, and the general public. It was only a couple of months ago that his DYS caseworker told me that it's not my "bad" parenting. I have two well adjusted, successful boys. They live in the same home, and go to the same school, and have the same opportunities as their brother, yet he is in trouble. Also he told me a "bad" parent would have given up a long time ago. He has NEVER worked with parents as involved as my wife and I. His mistakes are his own, not mine. I am far from perfect, but I'm still in there fighting for him after dealing with his problems for ten years now. If you have a similar situation I'll gladly listen to your advice, if not please save it cause you just don't understand. It is damn near impossible to help someone who doesn't want to be helped, but as a parent I can not give up, I have to do something.