"Answer the door Steve" the knocker said from behind the door "ANSWER IT NOW!"
Steve went to the door after several more knocks and when he opened it he saw a man holding a sword eating a small Ethiopian child who proclaimed with a full mouth "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die" he then drew his sword and droped the partially eaten child...
and blood spilled all over steve's hand made welcome mat made out of cat hair from his 20 cats he lived with. this infuriated steve and he withdrew his lightsaber and....
Then out of no where a sperm whale falls on ground next to Inigo, a bowl of petunias lands on Inigo's head knocking him out. When he awakes he is in a dark room with three buttons on the wall, one is labeled "Don't Push", another is labeled "Don't Panic" and the third is labeled "Don't Pull". Against his better judgement (possibly because of the head injury) Inigo reaches out and pushes the button labeled...
with an old fashioned press stamp which cuts his finger before he can push the button. when the blood drips onto the floor the floor awakens and an huge hole opens up beneath Inigo's feet, dropping him into a pitch black void where he falls and falls for what seems like days....nothing but perpetual falling. flailing around and never knowing when his fall will come to an abrupt end, inigo....
lands on a giant pile of mattressess covered in honey. Inigo think "WTF I feel a pea under these am I a princess?" Just then a bear comes out of nowhere and rears back to attack Inigo but a hunter appears from behind Inigo and shoots...
Inigo tries to run but can't do to getting shot in the buttocks, the bear then eats his. The hunter thinks says "that plan worked perfectly now while that bear eats that fool I can finally get out of here after being trapped here for so long".
The hunter runs and runs for hours on end until he finally comes upon a city made entirely of...
styrofoam! he couldn't believe his luck. styrofoam rubbing and squeaking made his skin crawl but he was so exhausted from running that he had to find a place to sleep and rest. reluctantly he approached the outer gates and...
was greeted by a man sized, talking styrofoam peanut. The peanut said "How goes it wanderer, my name is Mr. Planters welcome to Pactopia! What is your name?" The hunter trying to ignore the squeaking made with every movement Mr. Planters did replied "My name is Cornholio, I need to rest". Mr Peanut showed Cornholio to the local inn as he did he explained they are in the middle of a war against the Bubble Wrap Nomads however because it is obvious Cornholio is not a Bubble Wrap Nomad he is welcome in Pactopia. Once Cornholio went to sleep it started to rain...
Last edited by Yeahha; October 6th, 2011 at 03:51 PM.
Reason: That was a long post
and the sound of raindrops falling on styrofoam was deafening. he could not fall asleep for the sound of rain and every move he made in his styrofoam bed made squeaks which kept him on edge. so, he pulled out his pouch of wacky tobaccy and rolled himself a smoke. he tossed the match behind him and before he knew it, the styrofoam walls started to melt and spread like wildfire! he jumped up to fan the flames and realized...
it is raining so that should put out the flames, he just needs to get out of here to avoid responsibility. So he sneaks out the hole in the wall created by the fire only to realize the rain was heavy enough to make the rest of the city float away, the building he was in must have been held down by his weight. So he decides to keep walking to see if he could find perhaps a better place to stay, as he traveled he passed a field full of green, orange, and yellow...
"i'm gonna ride your porky green a$$ all the way home!" But the little green pygmy elephant bucked and threw the hunter off into a pile of poo and then walked away. next the hunter tried to sit on a yellow pygmy elephant but when he sat down he broke its back and killed it. seeing this the pink pygmy elephant....
Came over quickly and said "Hey there big fella, you can ride me all day and all night if you want, come on, climb on me and we can have the time of our lives"
asked "how much?" since this was what he usually said when someone made him that offer. the little pygmy elephant looked at him disgustingly and said....
"I am not that kind of elephant you dirty man you can walk for all I care" the pink pigmy elephant then vanished quickly running into the sunset. The hunter thought to himself how odd it is with everything that has happened, then he looked at his watch and saw it was Thursday, that explains it he thought I have never been good at Thursdays. The hunter then started walking again and came upon a bridge...
made entirely out of marshmallows. the marshmallow bridge spanned a hot chocolate river. on the river bank the hunter saw a boat made out of sugar cubes. he thought, "should i walk across this spongey bridge or ride across in that boat made of sugar?" he chose to walk the marshmallow bridge. when he stepped out on it the bridge sagged down under his weight just inches above the steaming river of hot chocolate. the marshmallows began melting and getting gooey from the steam. the hunter....
decided it would be best to run across the bridge before it melted fully. He made it almost all the way across before the bridge melted and he began to fall but landed on...
a log floating down the hot chocolate river. he rode this downstream and then the river picked up pace and the rapids got higher and hotter. he looked ahead and saw that he was heading towards a water fall! he began to panic and....
Suddenly something pulled him off the log and pullded him to shore, it was the pink pigmy elephant who said after you treated me like some kinda call girl I still saved your life", the hunter looked and said...
at that point the pink pygmy elephant trunk-slapped the hunter, sending him splashing into the roiling hot chocolate river and down, over the falls. the hunter fell 572 feet into a whipped latte lagoon, losing consciousness. he awoke some time later on shore, all sticky and covered in hot chocolate residue. ants were....
a giant body cast that covered the hunter, he then fell into a deep sleep only to wake up in his bed, he then said that is the last time I eat mushrooms before...
he accidentally knocks his glasses off the bed side table. Reaching for them as they fall to the floor, his blurry eyes discern a hairy, gnarled hand reach out from under the bed to catch the glasses before they hit the floor. And as the hand recedes back under the bed....
was leaving a trail of blood for a reason unknown to Henry. Suddendly as he came up from the basement Victoria was there holding a knife mumbling something about pigmy elephants and...
Sal limones clubs henry to death. "Farewell calavera.you were a failure" .Then victoria shoots Sal ,"very slow indee sal,age is catching up"
In his last ditch attempt henry detonates the explosives under his xbox with the xbox secret combo."we all die"
And then.
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We flash over to Julia. Looking down at her hand, covered in blood, she decides that her actions were justified. She had to ......... (what did Julia do...)
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Julia couldn't believe that the transformation would be like this. Zombification is new to her, but never did she think she'd keep her conscious. She did, however, notice that her vision seemed less colorful, everything was darker, more contrasted. Not quite monochromatic, but closer...
a werewolf came out of nowhere and bit her then went after Lozengezo who turned into a bat and flew off with the werewolf chasing. Julia looked up and thought "Any other mythical beasts want me to join up with their club tonight? Lich, ghoul, ghost, wight, or anything else, perhaps a lesser known type of undead or another human beast hybrid..." When out of nowhere...
A strange looking creature jumped from the bushes
Julia,"are you going to bite/sting/infect me so that I get converted to your cult"
Creature"no"
Julia"who are you"
Creature"chupacabra"
Julia"why wont you bite me"
Chupacabra"i am pretty nice guy."
Julia "so why are you here ?"
Chupacabra" you are standing on my home"
Suddenly Julia realizes .....
flew by still being chased by the werewolf, they both saw julia sinking and stopped then started laughing when in unison they both said "Julia quit acting dumb you are a werewolf-vampire-zombie you can get out of quicksand by ...
And suddenly chupacabra silenced both of them ."she need to learn the way of the zomwerevamipre .No short cuts ." Meanwhile 4 miles away from henry's home ....
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