Don't let it intimidate you, it is definitely worth any hassle in the end.
I've read a lot of the rooting tutorials, and youre right, they all say something different. Either using different methods, not updating instructions, or just not knowing how to explain things well. It really sounds a lot more complicated and time consuming than it actually is. I didn't realize this until I typed up a very detailed OTA 2.1 to 2.2 root tutorial for a friend.
Yes there's always the possibility something will go wrong, but the process is so refined now, that it's very very unlikely you'll do permanent damage.
If you want help, or want to follow my tutorial, let me know!
As for 2.2 ROMS, so far I've tried Bugless Beast, Kangerade, and NexBeast. In my experience, both BB and NB performed really well. Everything was smooth, and very fast. Kangerade didn't work out so well for me, it was very laggy and froze up a lot, and i felt I couldn't use it as a day to day ROM without an overclock kernel. After about an hour, it went into a bootloop out of nowhere. I tried wiping data and reinstalling, but ended up with the same performance.
Right now im using NexBeast and it's working great.