Corny Jokes..lets share

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by onpointG35, Dec 17, 2012.

  1. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    What did the bean say to the other bean.....How you Bean

    What lights up a Soccer Stadium.....A Soccer match

    What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine....Give me my Quaterback
     

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  2. inspired4g

    inspired4g Member
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    So a guy walks into a bar.....says ouch

    What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh
     
  3. inspired4g

    inspired4g Member
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    When is a door not a door? when its ajar.

    I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.

    What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan.

    How much does a polar bear weigh? enough to break the ice, Hi, I'm Alex
     
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  4. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    Lol yes keep em coming
     
  5. BigCiX

    BigCiX Well-Known Member
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    Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team?
    She ran away from the ball

    How do you make a handkerchief dance?
    Put a little boogie in it

    Why aren't there any Walgreens in Afghanistan?
    Because everything's a target
     
  6. eyebeam

    eyebeam Well-Known Member
    313

    So last night I had this weird dream that I was a muffler... I don't think I slept very well though - when I woke up, I was exhausted. :rolleyes::p
     
  7. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    lol nice
     
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  8. pbf98

    pbf98 Well-Known Member
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    Two men walked into a bar... the third one ducked

    What do you call a bear with no teeth?
    A gummy bear!


    What do you call a cow with no legs?
    Ground beef

    Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was asalted.

    What do you call a computer in the ocean?
    A Dell rolling in the deep
     
  9. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    Have anyone heard the joke about the butter...I can't tell you it might spread
     
  10. eyebeam

    eyebeam Well-Known Member
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    So, did you guys/gals hear about those new corduroy pillows? No? They've been making headlines... :p
     
  11. saptech

    saptech Well-Known Member
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    I went to a boxing match the other nite and a hockey game broke out!
     
  12. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    Man I'm so lost lol
     
  13. jefboyardee

    jefboyardee Well-Known Member
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    My grandpappy told me, never marry a woman with big hands... they’ll make your p••ker look small.
     
  14. saptech

    saptech Well-Known Member
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    Why can't a bike stand on its own? Because it is two-tired.
     
  15. kickbutkuss

    kickbutkuss Well-Known Member
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    Made my day...

    Thanks for the laughs!
     
  16. pbf98

    pbf98 Well-Known Member
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    Took me a while but i got it! lol
     
  17. NYCHitman1

    NYCHitman1 Gun for Hire
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    Q: Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
    A: Just in-case they get a hole-in-one.

    :)
     
  18. jefboyardee

    jefboyardee Well-Known Member
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    Mrs. Bigger had a baby. Who is bigger, Mrs. Bigger or the baby?

    The baby, because he’s a little Bigger.
     
  19. jefboyardee

    jefboyardee Well-Known Member
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    (I actually made this one up...)

    How many nymphomaniacs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    Just two, but they have to be really small.
     
  20. Liamo_210

    Liamo_210 Well-Known Member
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    This is all i have for now. ;)



    Have you heard of the new restaurant on the moon? The food is amazing, but I've heard its got no atmosphere
     
  21. Liamo_210

    Liamo_210 Well-Known Member
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    Also i found these.

    What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

    What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Dam
     
  22. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    lol I'm using the fish joke today
     
  23. saptech

    saptech Well-Known Member
    223

    If your wife is shouting at the front door and your dog is barking at the back door, who do you let in first?

    The dog, of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in.
     
  24. onpointG35

    onpointG35 Well-Known Member
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    Lol nice
     
  25. Kamau

    Kamau Well-Known Member
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    My mother-in-law.
    'nuff said.
     

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