Well spoke with another tech rep this evening...we finally got to the bottom of it...come to find out my phone has a TX area code and my wife's has a OK area code...
Does that sound possible or more like an excuse to not have to deal with my problem???
My wife and I's phones are setup EXACTLY the same software and setting wise according to numerous tech reps...our phone number area code is the ONLY difference it seems...
Different area codes assigned to your phones but you live in the same area code?
I take it you purchased your devices in different locations. If not, I'm puzzled about that.
But I do have an experience that your situation reminded me of: briefly, late last year I purchased a Nexus One from Google online along with T-Mobile service. The phone came to me and I went through the activation procedure but never could get reliable service; calls and messages were truncated every day, and I missed calls all day long, it turns out.
Well, I live and work in the 402 area but they'd assigned me an area code three states away because they had no towers in my location (I did not find out why the foreign area code was in my N1 until I'd cancelled my account and sent the phone back).
It turned out I'd missed calls all day long, and the few I got were, to me, one or two rings but to the caller many more, like 5, 6 or 7. Voice mail was never set up.
Perhaps they're not mistaken about the area code assignment causing your problem; the fact that you and your wife have the same settings speaks to that.
I'd get together with the techs and resolve the issue once and for all by biting the bullet and getting a new number assigned to the phone.