"Sounds like the only way to keep my info off their servers is if I don't use any contacts, calendar, email (forwarded email to gmail is still email on gmail), etc.on my phone"
You can turn off the automatic sync for any of the services. You'd just have to sync the first time to get the phone to work. You wouldn't just have to avoid contacts, calendar, and email, you'd also have to avoid ever using google search, blogger, picasa, feedburner, postini(which many corporations use to filter email, btw), you'd pretty much have to avoid using google, and any other search engine.
", which does not sound like a very good mobile experience."
All depends on what you want in a mobile experience. Android has offered up a very different and very specific mobile experience --- which you appear to not want. Totally your perogative.
Here's what I hear you asking: "I want a windows mobile experience, I want Windows Mobile features, windows mobile control, and windows mobile privacy --- but I want it on the Android phone, can I have it?"
The short answer is "No, it's not built that way." The long answer is, "maybe, but it's probably going to be a big hassle, and possibly not worth the trouble." That's why people are scratching their heads about this one.
To put it another way, you're asking "Can I buy a cat, but train it to behave exactly like a dog?" Again, it's possible, but what's the point?
I know people keep saying business users, business users, business users, but everything I see about this phone says to me that it does not appear to be designed for business users. There's a whole segment of the population that doesn't even know what exchange is, let alone need it on their phone. Business folks have blackberry, winmo, and (with some needling) the iPhone. Seems like the G1 was made for everyone else. But that's just my take.
Here's my question why not just stick with Winmo and seek out the tweaks and 3rd party apps that will make it more useful for you? Or switch to Blackberry? Seems like that might be an easier and more fruitful endeavor.