I feel your pain. Something how the stock system syncs with facebook. Either way, if I can't rearrange them or they just won't appear the way I want, I delete the initial attempt and add a new contact that doesn't sync up. I then have an app, Facebook sync. I then associate the new name, with last name first, with their facebook name.
Seems strange, but it's at least a workaround. It even works with situations like my brother's g/f.... I have listed under my family's last name (for convenience) even though her facebook has her correct last name. I simply associate the wrong name with her fb and viola