Product Giveaway from Tech Armor [Mod Approved][Winners Announced]

[TechArmor]

Hello AndroidForums.com!

We wanted to do something cool for the community by giving away some free product to 10 lucky winners who enter the contest.

To win, all you have to do is leave a comment with your favorite clean joke. NO Facebook sign-ups and NO complicated entry forms necessary to win.

Winners will be receiving an Anti-Glare/Anti-Fingerprint screen protector 3-Pack for the Nexus 5.


This contest is live for 7 days, ending on Tuesday December 8th, 2013 at 11:59PM, and at that time we

 

[iowabowtech]

It was an admin decision to be fair but we mods will take the credit anyway.

Free is cool. :rock:

 

[El Presidente]

Bah, US residents only!

Wouldn't have really made a difference, I don't think I know any clean jokes any more anyway!

 

[jj14x]

Why is it impossible to surprise a snowman?
Because he has ice in the back of his head

 

[Rxpert83]

Did you hear about the guy who's addicted to deli meat? Hes trying to quit cold turkey...

 

[UncleMike]

How do you throw a party in space? You have to planet!

Good luck everybody

 

[scary alien]

Bah, US residents only!

Wouldn't have really made a difference, I don't think I know any clean jokes any more anyway!

Here's one for ya, EP:

Q: What did the Loch Ness Monster say to his friend?
A: Long time no sea.

 

[BigCiX]

Q : What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

A: Anyone can roast beef.

 

[CoachEVO]

What do you get when you kiss a bird?
Chirpies! It's a Canarial disease that's untweetable!

 

[Omar Days]

What happened when the prawn went to the niteclub?

He pulled a mussel!

 

[csiemers]

An SQL Statement walks into a bar and sees a couple tables.
He walks over and asks them "can I JOIN you?"

 

[Unforgiven]

A guy walked into a bar and said 'Ouch!':vroam:

 

[elhamda]

A warthog hits this lady and the husband calls 911.

The operator asks, "Where are you at"?

The husband replies, "I'm on Eucolipstic Road."

The operator asks, "Can you spell that for me?"

"Well... I'll just drag her over to Oak so you can you pick her up there?"

 

[Rxpert83]

[....]
The operator asks, "Where are you at"?

The husband replies, "I'm on Eucolipstic Road."

The operator asks, "Can you spell that for me?"

"Well... I'll just drag her over to Oak so you can you pick her up there?"

Something tells me that's actually happened

:rofl:

 

[MotoTriumphant]

I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.

Good luck everyone!

 

[MartinS]

2 Monkeys in a bath.
One says "Ooh ooh ah ah"
The other says "Hot isn't it"

UK resident, fancied telling a joke...

 

[charliecc]

conjuntivitis.com

now that's a site for sore eyes.

 

[jj14x]

========================
My husband and I were dressed and ready to go out for a lovely evening of dinner and theatre. Having been burgled in the past, we turned on a 'night light' and the answering machine, then put the cat in the backyard.

When our cab arrived, we walked out our front door and our rather tubby cat scooted between our legs inside, then ran up the stairs. Because our cat likes to chase our budgie we really didn't want to leave them unchaperoned so my husband ran inside to retrieve her and put her in the back yard again.

Because I didn't want the taxi driver to know our house was going to be empty all evening, I explained to him that my husband would be out momentarily as he was just bidding goodnight to my mother.

A few minutes later he got into the cab all hot and bothered, and said (to my growing horror and amusement) as the cab pulled away.
"Sorry it took so long but the stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her arse with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck and wrapped her in a blanket so she wouldn't scratch me like she did last time. But it worked! I hauled her fat arse down the stairs and threw her into the backyard....she had better not shit in the vegetable garden again."

The silence in the taxi was deafening.....

 

[SDRANGER619]

Q : Why did the chicken cross the road

A: To get to the other side. (duh.)

 

[mk_ultra19]

Why couldn't Dracula's wife get to sleep?

Because of his " coffin "

 

[iowabowtech]

Why couldn't Dracula's wife get to sleep?

Because of his " coffin "

Call me old fashioned, but those kinda jokes really do crack me up.

 

[scary alien]

Call me old fashioned, but those kinda jokes really do crack me up.

Q. What did the egg say to the frying pan?

A.

 

[Ranhead]

I also love the classics...

Q. What do you get when you throw a blue hat into the Red Sea?

A. A wet hat

 

[badutahboy]

What do you get when you cross an Elephant and Rhino?

Elephino.

 

[Brian706]

There were two sausages in a frying pan and they were sizzlin' and sizzlin'...

One sausage looked at the other and said: "Oh my God! We're gonna die!".

The other sausage said: "Oh my God! A talking sausage!!".