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Student's Death

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Steven58, Jun 19, 2019.

  1. Steven58

    Moderator Thread Starter

    I found out a former student, who was only 31 committed suicide. I'm devastated. Just horrified. Grief.

  2. My condolences...Someone you taught?
    I have known a couple people who went like this, some shocking, some, in retrospect not surprised.
    My best friend did it, it will always hurt that he never felt he could reach out to any of us. The first friend I made in HS....

    It underscores that no matter how much we think we may know someone, you barely scratch the surface.....
  3. Steven58

    Moderator Thread Starter

    Yeah, a student of mine. I'm a voice teacher. She was greatly talented and exceptionally glamorous.
    Unforgiven, MoodyBlues and ocnbrze like this.
  4. olbriar


    I'm sorry Steven. It's impossible to think along the lines of ending one's life unless you are that distressed/distraught. Whatever brought her to that decision, I do hope she rests in peace.
  5. Steven58

    Moderator Thread Starter

    We remained FB friends and would chat occasionally. I keep wondering what I could have done. I'm telling everyone that I love them.
  6. lvt

    lvt Android Expert

    Sorry to hear about your student, did they find out why she committed suicide?
    MoodyBlues, Steven58 and Unforgiven like this.
  7. ocnbrze

    ocnbrze DON'T PANIC!!!!!!!!!

    i feel you @Steven58, couple of months ago, i lost a friend that i knew from college who was also a former coworker, committed suicide. it was the first time that i had someone who i new pretty well end his life. i just wish that i could have told him just how much he meant to me and what he did for me that helped me out tremendously. i never really got to show him the appreciation he so deserved.

    my condolences
    #7 ocnbrze, Jun 19, 2019
    Last edited: Jun 19, 2019
  8. Unforgiven

    Unforgiven ...eschew obfuscation...

    I'm sorry Steven. I know from personal experience how you question yourself when someone close commits suicide. Don't beat yourself up over it. :(
  9. MoodyBlues

    MoodyBlues Compassion is cool!
    VIP Member

    Oh, @Steven58, I'm so sorry to hear this. It may not seem like it right now, but the shock and sadness you're feeling will subside.
    Please don't beat yourself up over that. Even if you had had an inkling that she was that depressed, there's probably nothing you could have done.
    That's important. All of us should do that as part of our normal day, whether it's someone we're with daily, like a spouse, or talk to occasionally, like a far away grandchild or friend. Treat every conversation like it may be the last one--what do you want to remember, or be remembered, about it?

    I've lost two dear people to suicide in recent years, my best friend and then my brother. I get it.
  10. Hadron

    Hadron Smoke me a kipper...
    VIP Member

    As everyone has said, it's natural to ask whether you could have done more. But from what you've said I don't see how you could have suspected.

    I've known two suicides, one a neighbour (who took his family completely by surprise, never mind us) and one a very good friend who had a long-term severely debilitating illness and took a trip to a Swiss clinic. And even in her case I'd no idea she was contemplating this (for several reasons she told as few people as possible), and I'd seen her just a couple of weeks before. So sure, everyone asked whether we could have done more, and I think with more reason than you have here. But I'm sure the answer is that no, you couldn't, and you had no reason to suspect.
  11. Steven58

    Moderator Thread Starter

    Thank you, guys. I do love you all. Know that you are loved and highly valued.

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