Let me see if I can quickly knock out some answers for you!
1) 3rd Party SMS solutions allow this, like Handcent, I don't believe the stock SMS client has this option (but Handcent is _much_ better), there are some other 3rd party apps that allow this too.
2) I don't know if Moto will supply an app, but this has been a bit on an issue with Android. For example, my Captivate has a semi-unsupported app that syncs. Also see my answer to 3.
3) Here's the deal: Android offers this amazing wireless sync, but it's very dialed into Google services. So if you add a contact, calendar (image, document, etc.) in a Google service, it's immediately sync'ed up to your phone. Neat. The trouble is, there's not a 100% complete solution (without going 3rd party) to keep Outlook in sync.
Google offers a free calendar sync app, runs as a background service, and at user defined intervals, pushes Outlook calender items up to Google (which are then sync'ed back downstream). It's pretty slick. No option for contacts unless you go to the enterprise (pay) Google services or use a 3rd party app.
You can export, and upload into Google most of your Outlook resources and then they sync up.
If you're trying to avoid Google completely, then you have to fall back to the vendor supplied sync app (the matching app to iTunes). I used the Samung app one time, but wound up just exporting and uploading into Google since I like having my stuff on the web too.
With 2.2 Android you can actually push apps from the web to be installed on your phone. Again, very slick, but there's not really a backup app, unless (again), the individual phone vendor offers something.
That's where iTunes - love it or hate it - is terrific: plug in phone and your apps and data are backed up, OS updated, contacts/calendar sync'ed, music/playlists/counters all sync'ed.
Basically if you're going Android, part of the experience hinges on using other Google services.
4) Customization is pretty extensive, and even better than a JB'ed iPhone.
I read that thread. It's not what I was looking for. More specifically, I'd like to know the following:
1) Individual SMS tones for contacts?
2) How well does is sync with Outlook?
3) Can I sync outlook contacts without having to load them to my Google account?
4) Customization? - I've Jailbroken my 3GS
Thanks!