Looks like I'll be changing phones myself.
After a good hour and 1/2 trying to restore my F3 to no avail, I'm looking at the LG Tribute. For $80, it has reasonable specs. It has the same OS and processor as my Samsung Galaxy Tab 4! (But not as much memory, heh...) I also have to get a SD card for it... maybe all the overheating fried the F3 AND the SD card. Can't format the card at all, not even on my laptop in Ubuntu Studio. I can't even get the thing to go into download mode for unbricking. By that point, I knew that it may not be worth fussing over anymore. In the meantime, I've pulled my older Kyocera Event for daily use until I can get the Tribute (or one of the other phones in VM's lineup).
If I can put enough of the apps I need/want on the Tribute, like my Tab 4, I may not be inclined to run it rooted. I love rooting, but IMHO with the improvements that Google's made to Kit Kat, and possibly Lollipop, it seems to be less necessary for most folks to even consider rooting anymore...