if you find this entertaining (i know i did), you should check out a couple of the threads about using the verizon insurance fraudulently to get a new phone. There's some pretty good "entitlement" thinking around here.
There was also a good article on a tech site recently (can't remember which one) that talked about insurance companies noticing a huge trend in claims around the time new phones roll out. They are starting to deny claims more and more now.
As far as OP theory, won't work. ESNs are tracked. Sorry.
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