Science made Stupid

[brotherswing]

Explain the statement of the poster above you. Do so scientifically, incorrectly, and as stupidly as you can. The worse your explanation, the better. Then make your own statement for the next player to explain.
Example: (statement)The sky is blue. (Explanation) It had been red, but then saw that Sarah McLaughlin ad about the poor puppies and kitties and became very sad, thus blue.

Magnets stick together.

 

[septembersrain]

Magnets stick together because Magneto was a real character from the 1920's. He was partially Mormon and had the special ability of making metal stick to his big toe. Thus the idea of the magnet was born.

Rainbows are colorful.

 

[Yeahha]

Rainbows are colorful because rain is really angels crying and when they stop they show their happiness by throwing a party in the clouds, the rainbow is the part of the lights we see that escapes the cloud ceiling.

Gravity makes things fall

 

[karandpr]

It was probably yeahha's responsibility but he failed to not to make things not fall .heard they are going to replace him today ...

Glasses refract light

 

[Yeahha]

Glasses refract light because if they didn't we couldn't see pretty rainbows

Cold is the absence of heat

 

[septembersrain]

It's because for a while the sun takes a nap. It becomes very tired from it's exerting heat duties.
So therefore we feel cold.

Why is there an ozone layer?

 

[Yeahha]

They fall but don't hit the ground

How does grass grow?

 

[septembersrain]

Grass grows because it is a giant that is hiding in the center of the earth.
He allows his hair to be styled and modeled differently all over the world because he was naturally the first hipster.

Why is there pollution?

 

[karandpr]

Because Captain planet decided to visit Uranus .

Friction exists .

 

[septembersrain]

Friction exists because two different bodies are naturally attracted to each other.
Humans and other foreign entities are likely to rub up against each other for luck and other health reasons.

Why is there wind?

 

[Yeahha]

It is caused by when giants fart

How do cell phones work?

 

[septembersrain]

Cell phones work by emitting your voice 10x the normal volume. Then on the other end the persons phone captures only your voice by using a voice recognition software. It weeds out other voices that are also going 10x the volume, Therefore only one voice is heard. Three way calling does dual voice recognition software and uses a splitter to allow more than one person to talk at a time.

How does sunblock work?

 

[Yeahha]

When you put it on it makes you invisible so the sun passes thru you and you don't get burned

Why does hair grow?

 

[septembersrain]

Hair grows because it's an extension of our brain. That is why blonds are known to be stupid.

Why is perfect eye sight considered 20/20?

 

[Yeahha]

If it wasn't the phrase "Hindsight is 20/20" would make no sense

Why does it rain?

 

[septembersrain]

The aliens have a whole country. They have a whole civilization above us. The pipes below the their houses leak from time to time. It's why in certain places there are droughts. It's because this country does not have very much pipe over that region.

Why do you sneeze?

 

[atljatl]

Why do I sneeze? Let me address the larger issue; why do humans sneeze?
Humans sneeze not because of any physical environmental factor present at the moment of the sneeze per se. Rather it is the purging of imperceptable "thought-matter" (not my term, ask science) that has built up through years of hearing music produced from stringed instruments. Humans did not sneeze before the banjo, the first stringed instrument, was created.

Female kangaroos have pouches.

EDIT: For those of us asking questions instead of making statements of scienetifc fact; please read the op before a mod shuts this thread down. :turtle:
I'm joking. Kind of. No I am joking . 100%. Essentially.

 

[septembersrain]

They have pouches because nature meant for them to carry food to other animals many miles away. Unfortunately through natural selection they ended up having shorter than average hands and were unable to pull the food out to distribute it. So instead they were left with an empty space they had to fill.

Why is Snooki an Oompa Loompa? (I'm sorry, I couldn't help it)

 

[atljatl]

Lay people make the mistake of thinking orangutans are oompa loompas. Serious zoologists and midgetologists can easily tell the difference.
Humans have toes.

 

[9to5cynic]

Humans have toes because 40 years ago, someone said, "I bet our feet would be better if they had little tiny useless fingers sticking out of them." Everyone agreed, so they decided to evolve them.

Optical illusions work.

 

[septembersrain]

Optical illusions work because your brain sees the most boring image ever and attempts to spruce it up. This is to prevent your brain from shutting down due to Boredomitis.

Humans have two nostrils.

Sent from my LG-LG855 using Tapatalk 2 Beta-5

 

[karandpr]

The Eldar Human had four nostrils ,twenty millenia ago .He pawned it off for candy .

Diamond is the hardest material .

 

[atljatl]

Before diamond and plastic devolved into inanimate objects, plastic was the hardest material. However, plastic lost a bet on horseracing to diamond and ceded away that particular property: hardness
Animal waste doesn't smell very good (to me.)

 

[Yeahha]

That is because you are not preparing it right or you need to recalibrate you sense of smell

Breathing is essential to human life

 

[9to5cynic]

Breathing is essential to human life because contained within the air are ionized molecules of gold, and we all know that gold is processed by the respiratory system and channeled to the cerebral cortex to confound the alien piloting your brain.

Telephones allow communication across vast distances.