My advice: if you are using Car Mode in connection with 3rd-party programs like Car Dock Home v3, DON'T INSTALL THE 2.3.5 OTA, UNLESS YOU ARE WILLING TO ROOT YOUR DEVICE AFTERWARDS. I'm reluctant to do this considering the risks involved, so don't know what to do now.
Sorry to hear that HTC have been useless to you on this!
I understand that you might be hesitant in rooting, but let me assure you, there is a one click root method that does the whole process for you (roots, installs clockworkmod recovery, simunlocks your phone, etc) - the link to it is here - http://androidforums.com/desire-hd-...guide-dhd-all-things-root-roundup-sticky.html
The only thing that you really loose is your manufacturer warrantee.
It might be worth seeking advice from El Presidente, just to ensure that the Hack Kit works on phones that have the update, although I am reasonable sure that it does!
Hope you manage to solve your problems - good luck!!