The (Official?) “I’m Married” Thread

[olbriar]

 

[olbriar]

 

[Dannydet]

Lol! So true!

 

[Milo Williamson]

My wife always buys me the most expensive objects, like giving herself a samsung recorder 3.33333....
Meanwhile I am like "Yeah you should get some groceries first. The fridge needs food.. "

 

[The_Chief]

Sometimes it's great being married to a Navy cook and pastry chef: every time she desserts me, I'm actually happy about it!

Sometimes it's not so great...

ME: "Honey, what are you making for dinner tonight?"
HER: "Nothing..."
ME: "Nothing??? Babe, we had nothing for dinner last night!"
HER: "I know, I made enough for two nights"

 

[fubar761]

I hope there is enough space around the toilet

 

[olbriar]

 

[Milo Williamson]

"Honney will you pass me the cottage cheese?"

"Cottage Cheese will you pass me the Honey?"

"Will you pass Cottage Honey to the Cheese?"

What, hearing aid problems with people

 

[olbriar]

 

[The_Chief]

 

[olbriar]

 

[shmn]

 

[treb1797]

 

[Milo Williamson]

View attachment 166554

She puts on Alexa cloud...

 

[rootabaga]

 

[olbriar]

 

[olbriar]

 

[Milo Williamson]

wife:
Oh, I am surprised that ending of a chick flick movie, oh man I am going to cry, thanks for sitting with me.
Me:
Yeah, it was a heartwarming episode of Breaking Bad.

 

[olbriar]

 

[rootabaga]

My wife: I don’t have control issues.


Also my wife: I should talk to the manager at Costco because they never cut the pizza slices all the way through when you order a whole pie.

 

[BrickHouse]

There's an ace or two in that message.
I've lost a shirt in that casino.

 

[The_Chief]

I learned whole new levels of frugality after we got married. I'm no longer what could be considered a "wine snob". The wine we buy now is so cheap it doesn't have a vintage date... it has an expiration date.

 

[TechGuy1]

 

[rootabaga]

I learned whole new levels of frugality after we got married. I'm no longer what could be considered a "wine snob". The wine we buy now is so cheap it doesn't have a vintage date... it has an expiration date.

My wife is a kindred spirit.

That said, the toilet paper in the place we just stayed was so bad (how bad was it?!?) that even she didn’t bring home the spare roll in the vanity…

 

[rootabaga]

Remember to treat your wives right for Mother’s Day, guys…