Corny Jokes..lets share

[huh]

two buddies went hunting, while in the woods one of them suddenly grabbed his chest keeled over and was lying on the ground.His friend ran over to him and called 911 when the operator answered he said" omg I think my friend is dead what do I do?" she said.."ok calm down first we have to make sure he is really dead." he said "ok hold on.."
a shot gun blast rings out and then he comes back and says.."OK .. now what?"

 

[lunatic59]

My doctor told me I was both a tepee and a wigwam. I must be too tense.

 

[huh]

My doctor told me I was both a tepee and a wigwam. I must be too tense.

hmmmm I have reservations....

 

[pool_shark]

My daughter told me this when she was a little girl. I loved it of course.

Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 8 9.

 

[onpointG35]

Where does a one legged waitress work..........Ihop

 

[davoid]

There was this zoo, and all the animals died one by one until all that was left was a single dog.

It was a shitzoo.

 

[SeniorAlex]

This guy was walking along the road pulling a piece of sting. Another guy asked 'why are you pulling that piece of string'? The first guy replies 'have you ever tried pushing it?

Another guy walking along with a dog who was wearing brown boots. A lady passing by asked 'why is your dog wearing brown boots?' The answer came back ..... ' his black ones are being mended'

Alex

 

[Mehta23]

Knock knock
Who's there
To
To who
To whom...

 

[kickbutkuss]

Manti Te'o...

 

[Mehta23]

What do you call a baby lamb in a stream?

A lamb in a flow :-D

 

[smokinjoe1979]

Two bears are taking a shower. The first bear says "please pass the salt." The second bear looks at him and asks "what do you think I am, a radio?"

 

[smokinjoe1979]

How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.

 

[Mehta23]

Two bears are taking a shower. The first bear says "please pass the salt." The second bear looks at him and asks "what do you think I am, a radio?"

-_- I don't get it?

 

[onpointG35]

-_- I don't get it?

I'm with you (0_0)

 

[NightHawk877]

-_- I don't get it?

He/she meant soap.

What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.

 

[onpointG35]

How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.

lol lol I like that

 

[davoid]

-_- I don't get it?

Yeah me neither.

He/she meant soap.

Yeah, but what's the comment about being a radio mean? That's the punchline, after all...

 

[Unforgiven]

A guy walked into a bar and said "ouch"

 

[Metroid Prime]

Why did the ghost cross the road?

Spoiler

To get to the other "Side"

 

[EarlyMon]

Yeah me neither.

Yeah, but what's the comment about being a radio mean? That's the punchline, after all...

It's an anti-joke, nearly a half-century old, it just won't die. There's nothing to get.

 

[davoid]

It's an anti-joke, nearly a half-century old, it just won't die. There's nothing to get.

I got that it wasn't meant to make sense, but I was really responding to the explanation that he asked for the salt instead of soap, as if that clarified the joke, whereas the real confusion was in the unrelated punchline.

It's surrealist in nature, with the juxtaposition of unrelated irrelevant elements.

Anyway...



What's brown and sticky? ........................................................ a stick.