I hear you, man. I've written rants about various devices including a 10 page tirade about Toshiba's customer support. Of course that was in a personal blog and not here. OfTheDamned is right about the helpful nature of support forums in general and these in particular. If you yell fire in a crowded theater, some people will run and some will pull out the marshmallows, but don't be surprised if you end up with a bucket of water in your face, too.
You are going to hate this, mostly because it's 'helpful' and I wouldn't want to harsh your expressive catharsis but your phone has gone cattywumpus. (sorry, if i'm using too much technical jargon
). Seriously, that is not the way the phone should be behaving and I seriously suspect there is an app accessing the dialer inappropriately or the dialer itself has become corrupted. It is more likely the former than the latter because if the latter were the culprit, you probably wouldn't be able to make or receive calls either.
I would seriously consider a factory reset and see if that clears up the data bleeding.
Let me offer a word of caution. Many apps provide services for other parts of the OS and if you remove them, you can disable certain features or make your phone unusable. More importantly, system apps are not easily restorable like simply installing an .apk file. And once deleted, even a factory reset will not recover them. You will have to locate and flash a stock rom image to get them back. Facebook, YouTube and Dialer are apps that if you delete them will render your phone unusable. A safer way to handle this is to root your phone and then freeze those apps with Titanium Backup.
There are absolutely problems with Android and it's implantation across a wide array of devices. We discuss them every day. And, it's human nature to want to blow off some steam when a device has frustrated you to the point of ...well ... this. I think some of the contradictions you are getting in other peoples' opinions are how you drew your conclusions. I don't completely agree with your assessments, although I do scratch my head every time Google redoes the Market interface (I still can't get used to calling it "play").
Microsoft took a lot of heat for Vista when it was first released, but it really wasn't as bad as they claim. It was actually a huge step forward. The problems arose when the manufacturers balked at the minimum spec's to be "Vista Certified" as many of their current models were short in one area or another ... enough to keep them from getting the sticker. Microsoft (and this was the problem) then lowered the spec to "Vista Capable" which allowed Dell and Toshiba and Sony, et. al. to not have to pull the current models from inventory. Now you have a whole lot of people buying new computers below the recommended spec' and having a pretty bad experience in the process.
I think the LG Optimus kind of puts you in a similar position. It is a lower spec'ed device and will run into problems with newer software/firmware where more capable models won't.
Please don't take this as a criticism of you or any choices you have made, or even the Optimus. It is what it is ... a budget model with all the limitations that go with it. However, while you are considering other platforms, you might also want to consider a more robust android device too. (Yeah, I'm an enthusiast and would like to see you satisfied with Android, but I'm more interested in seeing you satisfied in general.)
Good luck with whatever you decide.